Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Americas Cup Preview


The next Americas Cup is going to be awesome. Think NASCAR on the water. 90' x 90' rockets racing at speeds close to 40 knots with amazing wipeouts and pitchpoles. Major carnage and lots of hoopla! The races will occur before the end of February somewhere on the planet that boosts light airs for these light and fragile craft. With immense sail area, the loads on the boats could exceed 100 tons according to local experts. The boats are shrouded in secrecy but L38 spoke to a duck that wandered into the compound of BMW/Oracle in San Diego. Here is what the mallard said:

"Last year they had the tri sailing at more than 40 knots, which would be fast enough to get my feathers ruffled. Given the speeds and loads, somebody could really get hurt. No wonder that principle helmsman James Spitall and the rest of the crew wear helmets and body armor. And that there are EMTs on the support boats that chase the big tri. There have been rumors around the nest that Larry Ellison, owner of the campaign, sailed on the tri once, and that was enough for him. What's even more telling is that Russell Coutts, the America's Cup legend, is rumored to be afraid of the boat, too. But I think that's just gossip, don't you?

"You probably want to know what they've been doing inside that building since they stopped sailing operations in February," said the loquacious duck without giving us time to answer his question. "I'd probably end up as Peking duck on the BMW Oracle crew menu if they knew that I told you, but they've been making a hard sail for the trimaran. Sort of like the one Dennis Conner used when his catamaran beat the Kiwi 'big boat' monohull in the funky America's Cup in San Diego many years ago. I also heard that something like $5 million was spent on either modifying or replacing the two outer hulls. If anyone is feeling sorry for syndicate owner Larry Ellison, they don't have to. My 401K for ducks has taken a beating in the last year, but not from Oracle. They had an operating income of almost $8 billion in the last quarter, and if I'm not mistaken, Ellison still owns something like 20% of the company. So he's not having to chase the America's Cup with a cup in his hand."

"But when is the big tri going to be test-sailing again?" we asked.

"I'm glad you asked," said the duck, "because the big news is that they'll be sailing shortly. If you're in San Diego, you won't be able to miss her. But at the speed she travels, you won't be able to see her for long — unless you're in one of those F-18s flying out of North Island."

Since the duck seemed to be such a know-it-all, we asked him who he was picking to win the next Cup. "Some chicks and I were discussing the America's Cup the other day, and figure BMW Oracle has their work cut out for them. I'm just a duck, but I figure this is going to be — because of the extreme speeds and risk of personal injury and boat destruction — the most NASCAR-like America's Cup ever."

No comments:

Post a Comment